By Donna F. LaMar

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For example, if parents use lying as a way to get along in the world and never punish their children for lying, the children also learn and use this pattern of getting along in the world. 3. Expecting children to be adults before their time. " These individuals are saying that they had to supply the support and guidance needed for their own growth and development, which should have come from their parents. These children learn early, 28 Chapter 2 sometimes as early as infancy, that they have to rely on themselves for the knowledge and wisdom needed to make it in their world.

I was so anxious. I thought at times I was going to just die because the feelings were so intense. The pain and tension would overwhelm me. There were times when I couldn't function, and I would just go to my room or a place in the park and sit there. I wouldn't think, feel, or anything. I would sit in a stupor just trying to stop the pain. Other times, I just kept going because it hurt too much not to. The pain of the beatings was awful, but not half as bad as the loneliness and the emotional pain of being isolated in the family.

Other times, I just kept going because it hurt too much not to. The pain of the beatings was awful, but not half as bad as the loneliness and the emotional pain of being isolated in the family. That pain lasted forever. It was like an empty, black void where my pain accumulated. My family just kept pouring more and more pain and suffering into it. One of the ways they did this was to play emotional games. They would pretend that I could be part of the family. I would get so excited about finally being a part, belonging, but at the last minute, they would change their minds and reject me.

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